Imposter Syndrome

I’ve always had trouble battling imposter syndrome, which ties into my trouble charging a lot and accepting too little income, as I discussed with the recruiter yesterday. Not that it helps for what’s a good income to change so dramatically over time. What was a great income in 1978 is live with your parents or in a car money these days. What was good money five years ago needs to be higher by an amount equal to the entire good annual income of thirty years ago. Crazy.

But yeah, I suffer from lack of focus, but not lack of ability or potential. I only think I’m worthless much of the time. Probably a good reason for people not to shoot me down when I do get cocky, because that may be annoying, but the quashing of it contributes to fear that I’m no good and unwillingness to tout myself even if I have a solid idea otherwise. Even the people who chip what they are willing to pay have contributed, because to me there’s a direct correlation between your cheapness and my perception of not being worth anything.

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